Dear Smuckers,
(I write in my letter)
Your jam is good,
but grandma's is better.
I go ape for your grape
and your peach takes the cake
but the truth must be told
your strawberry's old
and the raspberry smells like cheddar.

so, i hear russia and china vetoed the un security council's resolution to condemn the facist regime currently waging assaults on anti-government protesters in syria. i just want to assure the people in russia who read my blog (which is apparently a fairly large number), that i don't blame you. i blame your un representative. to be fair, you are right to refuse to be the world's police, but then again, that's kind of what the un is. i appreciate your support of the sovereignty of nations though.

i don't have to placate china. they probably aren't allowed to read blogs anyway.

The Game of Thrones is ruining me

I just had one of those moments where I become supremely and incandescently happy because I feel as though I just stumbled upon something stupendous. I was pondering the luck of an acquaintance who will be studying in England on full scholarship, and then I realized: at some point she will die and become a rotting piece of flesh that once resembled a human being. In fact, we all will. Regardless of what we do with the time we are given, eventually it always runs out and we become worm salad.

I know what you're thinking: Wow, you must be a spiteful, vindictive person to feel joy at the thought of your friend's eventual death and decay. And to you I say this: After all the awful things we do to ourselves to set ourselves apart from the rest of the world, after all the striving and planning and machinations, the triumph and humiliation of life, it is comforting to know that regardless of all that, we are all equal in the end.

Also, I have been watching The Game of Thrones, which might account for my overt morbidity.

Words of the Winter

i read the new glitterpony and thought many nice things about the poets who submitted its limbs. but a confession is always a lovely thing for a friday, and so i must say Billy Cancel had my favorite line:

attained your zenith in low pressure
troughs but i loved you nonetheless nimbus upon the edge of rain

Billy Cancel- From the slime adhering to each propeller

check it out.

Delectable Morsel of Info

Number one: where are all these pictures of olde time brunches with hatted people coming from? It seems everyone and their mom is having brunch with people in fedoras. And by everyone, I mean mostly the dear Molly Crickman. Maybe I shouldn't be surprised by the number of fedoras in her pictures but I am. So deal with it.

Number two: much love to Russia. For those of you who are not me and therefore cannot read my blog stats, you should know that Russia is seriously interested in me. So watch out America, Russia loves Americans that eat a ton of fruit. And Russia, you should know my life changed the day I first tried pierogis. It was a good day. 

Number three: the first new recipe has been posted to my other, less-about-me-but-still-kind-of-about-me blog. If you've never tasted or seen frogmore stew, crawl out from under that rock and prepare your face to receive the beautiful bounty that is a big, steaming bowl of something tasty. The Essential Pantry- Frogmore Stew Do it. You know you want to.